Ramblings from my life…

Cry a little…

What’s that song by Bette Midler?

You’ve got to give a little, take a little
And let your poor heart break a little
That’s the story of,
That’s the glory of love

You’ve got to laugh a little, cry a little
Until the clouds roll by a little
That’s the story of,
That’s the glory of love

As long as there’s the two of us
We’ve got the world and all its charms
And when the world is through with us
We’ve got each other’s arms

You’ve got to win a little, lose a little
Yes, and always have the blues a little
That’s the story of,
That’s the glory of love

Why do we tend to hold our tears in until we break? I have so many emotions right now. I’m tired, I miss my husband, my kids are driving me up the wall, my house is dirty, my laundry is way past due, I’ve got to schedule this and that… play-date here, kindergarten registration there… baby shower, field trip, worship team, bathe kids because they really stink, make dinner… I could go on and on – you all know the routine. (side note for husband, the kids do not stink, I AM cleaning them regularly!)

People think I have it so together. I’m always bubbly, happy, smiling when they see me. I always have a plan, seem organized and am on the go. Most of this is true, but at the days end I’m just two things… Lonely and frustrated.

Tonight I let it go. I was giving the kids a bath and letting them play. As they were laughing and splashing, I started to cry. Not just a leak but real blown out crying. Pig Me Too asked what was wrong and I told her that I just missed daddy.

Later, after the kids were in bed and I was enjoying a glass of vino, I reflected on my day. We had spilled milk (literally) which took 20 minutes to clean up from the table, chair, pants, etc… then a pit stop to the pharmacy and finally a field trip with Pig Will’s class. When we arrived back at my parents house (where I’m staying the weekend), Pig Me Too was zonked out, I placed her on the couch where she slept for an additional 45 minutes until I woke her. We had dinner, which did not go over well with one cranky child in particular. By the time I got them in the tub, I just let it all go. There were about 20 other things that happened in-between those events, but I don’t want to bore you!

The last time I cried was about five weeks ago. I was getting ready in the morning and stopped to smell my husbands after shave. Big mistake.

It is okay to cry… and I really should do it more often!


2 responses

  1. Big hugs to you. I hear you, sister, I’ve been in that same place. Cry when you need to and hang in there!

    April 29, 2007 at 4:06 pm

  2. Erin

    Of course it’s okay to cry! You are doing a great job of being strong for the girls, but sometimes you need a break, too! Give us a call and we’ll get together soon, ok?

    April 30, 2007 at 2:20 pm

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